Archive for Coaching

Feb
13

Handling Conflict

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Some­times, mis­un­der­stand­ing arises when we do not under­stand other people’s map of the world, or in other words, when we can­not put our­selves in their shoes. Each per­son reacts to the other, the sit­u­a­tion esca­lates, emo­tions inten­sify, and the chance of reach­ing a mutu­ally ben­e­fi­cial agree­ment dis­ap­pears in a puff of smoke.

One of the most effec­tive ways to solve con­flicts is to be able to see the other person’s per­spec­tive. Many times, this is all that is needed to defuse ten­sion, ini­ti­ate a dif­fer­ent mind-frame, and open the path to a solu­tion to the con­flict or argument.

Whether you’re prepar­ing for a meet­ing, deal­ing with fam­ily mem­bers, sell­ing, nego­ti­at­ing, coach­ing, or giv­ing a pre­sen­ta­tion, the abil­ity to con­sciously choose the per­spec­tive you want to have on the sit­u­a­tion mas­sively increases the like­li­hood of suc­cess. This is what in NLP we call ‘Per­cep­tual Posi­tions’, i.e. dif­fer­ent per­spec­tive from which you per­ceive a sit­u­a­tion or prob­lem which involves sev­eral people.

In this short audio, I’ll take you through the 3 Per­cep­tual Posi­tions. Leave com­ments at the bot­tom of this page if you have any. Click on the lit­tle arrow below to start the audio player.

Audio clip: Adobe Flash Player (ver­sion 9 or above) is required to play this audio clip. Down­load the lat­est ver­sion here. You also need to have JavaScript enabled in your browser.

Want to know more? The sched­ule of all courses can be found here. Look for NLP Prac­ti­tioner, Coach & Hyp­no­sis Cer­ti­fi­ca­tion Training.

Categories : Coaching, How To, MP3, NLP
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Jan
17

The Mind Capacities

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Have you ever taken a test, or assess­ment to dis­cover who you are, what job best suits you, or which rela­tion­ships fit you best? Do you know your “type”?

Think­ing Styles.

Too many mod­ern assess­ments and mod­els put peo­ple in boxes: you’re an A-type, where you hang in the 4 quad­rants, mod­els of per­son­al­ity etc… As much as it is use­ful to dis­cover cer­tain char­ac­ter traits, those tend to limit us rather than assist us to expand our per­cep­tion of who we are and how we are “sup­posed” to behave, because they tend to func­tion deduc­tively (from out­side to inside) rather than induc­tively (from inside to outside).

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Categories : Coaching, Reframe
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Jan
15

The Scientific Nature of Consciousness

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Susan Black­more is ded­i­cated to under­stand­ing the sci­en­tific nature of con­scious­ness. Her lat­est work cen­ters on the exis­tence of memes — lit­tle bits of knowl­edge, lore, habit that seem to spread them­selves using human brains as mere car­ri­ers. She’s explor­ing the exis­tence of a new class of meme, spread by human tech­nol­ogy. It’s tem­porar­ily named the “teme.”

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Categories : Coaching, How To, Science
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Dec
17

New Goals for the New Year

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This is THE time of the year again! Look­ing back on what hap­pened in 2009, good res­o­lu­tions and new goals for 2010.
Here are a few things you’ll want to know to set goals THAT WORK for 2010. Remem­ber, your Uncon­scious Mind is the goal get­ter and it needs pre­ci­sion, so read on.

When you set them, make sure your goals are SMART:

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Categories : Coaching, How To
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Alfred Korzyb­ski in “Sci­ence and San­ity” (1933) reflects on the verb “to be” and the process of iden­ti­fi­ca­tion. He used to train peo­ple to avoid say­ing “I am”, ask­ing them “Is this all you think you are?”.

Have you noticed when we are asked “who are you”, often, we say our name, and maybe men­tion our occupation/job title? Is this all we are? The verb TO BE can be lim­it­ing and reflects our beliefs about ourselves.

His work was based on the view that human beings are lim­ited in their knowl­edge by the struc­ture of their per­cep­tions and their lan­guage. Unable to expe­ri­ence the world directly, they resort to “abstrac­tions” (non-verbal per­ceived impres­sions and ver­bal indi­ca­tors expressed through lan­guage). The struc­ture of our per­cep­tions and our lan­guage (which deter­mine our under­stand­ing) some­times mis­leads us as to what is going on, what we must deal with. We cre­ate an abstrac­tion and this is the real­ity we deal with. He called for an increased aware­ness in each of us of that process of abstraction.

Inter­est­ingly enough, some 800 years before Korzyb­ski, in India, Shankaracharya, the cre­ator of the phi­los­o­phy of non-duality Advaita Vedanta, men­tioned the human process of “Adhyasa”, super­im­po­si­tion of mean­ing onto the unchang­ing real­ity through our senses, and its rem­edy, “Apavada” decon­struc­tion of the oper­a­tion of the senses.

Expand­ing the struc­ture of our lan­guage and our per­cep­tions, we can truly achieve mind-bloggling results!

Mind-Changing Courses.
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Categories : Coaching, Reframe
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